Spider-Man Really Isn’t That Cool Though.

11 Jan

It was the standard yet surreal twenty minutes daily at 1 AM where I stood spaced out in the shower contemplating my lack of self-worth.  As the steaming water ran sharply onto my back, I stood there totally blank, nearly dizzy, allowing my primal autopilot to take over; In a deep meditation, I reflected on my own uselessness.

With my periphery I had caught the movement of a small spider in the corner of the shower stall; The spider remained totally still once it’d touched onto my attention.  A fragment of claustrophobia had crept into my consciousness as the sting from the heat of the water built up onto my neck. I was intimidated by the spider’s poise and consistency as it stood there motionless.

Before I could fully understand what I was doing, I was squeezing toothpaste and shampoo over the spider; I was playing with it.  The spider dodged in small quick spurts, in a minesweeper-like fashion, but at this point I was no longer intimidated.  I was so good at estimating where to squeeze that shampoo bottle so the green ooze would land right on the spider.

Ten minutes later, once I had come to full awareness, I’d realized what I had done.  The spider was drowning, it was shaking.  The spider had spent its last moments in an ocean of turquoise blue Head & Shoulders shampoo.

I’ll admit, the first thing that came to mind was that “at least the spider died smelling nice.”  But I immediately realized how wrong the scene was.

In my most automated state, I could do nothing more than end the life of an innocent creature.  When I grasped the full extent of the events that transpired, I felt profoundly ashamed; I was astounded by my own lack of consideration.

By then the water had gone from a boiling heat, to a lukewarm and borderline uncomfortable temperature.  I was embarrassed, how could I make up for the wrong I had done?  How could I make things right?

The blue corner became a monument to the memory of the spider.  From that day forward, until I unintentionally kicked it down the drain, the spider served as a reminder of my impudence and lack of humility.  I just know that the spider is now at rest in spider heaven.

Love,

TheMiserableRanter

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